The other day I was at our local grocery store. I was trying to get in and out (you’ve been there) with my youngest son in tow. He was riding on the end of my large grocery cart. My cart was getting heavier, and my ability to turn the cart with my son’s weight on the end was proving to be challenging.
I was almost done. I just needed a few items from the healthy section. I was about to turn a corner when I came to the infamous intersection. The place where you meet other fellow grocery shoppers and look them in the eye. Will you let them go or will you push your way through.
In this particular moment I met another mom face to face. She was in a hurry, just as much as me, with a much younger child by her side.
I stopped.
I deferred and offered her the right of way.
I assumed that she would thank me for my kindness, but instead was faced with the opposite.
She huffed and rolled her eyes.
She went the other way.
. . .
At this moment most people would go their merry way and let it go. If you know me, I unfortunately do not have this gift. I blame it on a lot of things:
The need to find closure
The need to self protect and prove that my actions were not wrong
Maybe, perhaps, some pride
I yelled back to the mom in a nice voice, “which way were you going?”
It doesn’t matter! She grumbled back rudely.
I huffed off with my cart and yelled back down Nature’s Marketplace,
It’s hard to push this cart with a child and I was trying to let you by!
I was infuriated! How could this mom be so rude. I even grumbled to my six year old son about it.
That lady was so rude, I whined like a two year old.
I didn’t stop there. Later that night I grumbled to my husband about it, looking for some sympathy.
I told him all about my interaction at the grocery store! I complained. I even said words like, “She’s probably just an overly crunchy mama who thought she was too good for me. She probably thought I wasn’t good enough to be in the healthy section. She was so rude! How could she do that?
Instead of giving me sympathy, my husband looked at me and said,
Maybe she was just having a bad day? Give her a break.
Ouch.
He was right.
I was judging her and assuming so much in just one tiny interaction.
Maybe she had a fight with her husband that morning?
Maybe she lost a loved one?
Maybe she was suffering from depression and was at a breaking point?
We never know what others are walking through. So just be kind. Even when you were right. Be kind above the need to prove yourself.
In the end, it doesn’t matter if we were right, if we respond with bitterness and anger.
Learn from my mistake.
Love,
A repentant grocery shopper