You’ve had a bad morning? Possibly the bad morning is a result of a regretful week and even month. Your kids have been fighting non stop. You are tired and weary. Not physically, but emotionally. I see you and I want to reach through this not so friendly virtual screen and give you a real hug. A hug that isn’t a quick embrace, with a nonchalant pat on the back, but a real hug. A hug that pulls you in close, with trembling arms… a hug that whispers, I’ve been there and I know.
Your emotions have you running ragged. Hormones. Babies. Life. Hormones. Coffee. More coffee. Where did I leave my coffee cup? Oh, it’s cold- again. More hormones. Babies. Stop fighting. Do your homework. Mommy loves you. Here’s a band aid. Stop bugging your brother. Tears. Hormones. More coffee. Crash in bed!
These years of raising children are hard. Plain hard. Some days are pure awesome! We have seemed to keep our cool. No yelling. Soft voices. Things seem to be flowing smoothly.
I use to think I was a perfect parent when I had just one child. Are you with me? Then you add another and third to the mix, and you actually have to coordinate everyday chaos into beautiful music! That takes serious talent. Like America’s Got Talent should hire all us moms and be done with the show, kind of talent! ehhhum…
Can I reach in close and remind you and I of something this morning? It’s worth the hard work! It’s worth the sweat. It’s worth the tears. And yes, it’s even worth the momentary break down moments…
Picture with me for this brief moment in time, something spectacular and life changing. God’s placed this on my heart and I would love to share it with you. It’s really very simple, but so profound.
See that young child before you? The one that is bugging the snot out of you with his/her annoying habits and whiny behavior? Look at that child. Really stop, and look into their eyes. Add 20 years to their age and picture where they will be one day. How will, the life giving words and actions you display before them today impact them with 20 years added to their life in this moment? It may seem far away, but you and I both know how fast life slips by. In an instant, our children will be adults. Grown adults. (Insert mind blowing moment)
Our daily moments will impact the course of their future adult self. Yes, they will eventually have to make their own choices and walk the path they decide for themselves, but you and I as parents have such an awesome responsibility!
5 Things You Can Do Today That Will Impact Your Future Adult Children
1) Hug them and tell them you love them every day
Affection is so important. For boys and girls. For human beings. When parents initiate personal contact and physical connection their children will feel secure and valued. Parent-initiated affection will provide and safe and healthy home for our children to grow up in.
2) Tell them you are proud of them
Words. Words of life. Tell your kids you are proud of them every day for the right choices they make. Focus on the good they are doing, and they will be motivated to do more good! That smile on your face and words of affirmation will move mountains in the way of personal development and growth. Focus especially on those character traits and spiritual gifts you witness developing in them. It’s great to say you are proud they can do a front handspring or catch that deep pass, but even more the times they include that outcast friend on the bus into their peer group or show generosity and kindness.
3) Hold them to high standards
Sometimes we don’t give our children enough credit. They are smart little booger makers! When we hold them to high standards (realistic ones) we tell them they can do anything they put their minds to with God’s help! We show them that no matter what difficulties they face, hard work and persistence pays off. Sometimes we’ll have to watch them struggle and fail. That hurts our mommy hearts. But the joy that rises up in them when they finally overcome that obstacle or struggle? Priceless.
4) Spend quality time with them as a family
We are living in a busy world, and it is only getting busier! Clubs, sports, school work, jobs, MOPS groups, serving in church, can almost swallow us up if we aren’t careful! While all these things may be good things, we need to make time to enjoy one another as a family. Giving our children a safe haven will hopefully give them a place to bring their teenage friends to one day. If they feel safe now, accepted, loved, it will go a long way.
5) Fill your home with God’s Word
Apart from God’s Word, we are ALL one step away from failing big time! God’s Word is living and powerful and full of life. If we fill our homes with God’s Word, it will be such a beautiful place to raise future God-seekers! When they are adults, may our children look back and be thankful for the moments they remember reading the Bible in the morning with their siblings. Those flash cards of scripture hung on their wall to memorize. Prayer at the dinner table. Prayer before bed as mom and dad lean in close to kiss their foreheads.
Little moments like these, that we sometimes rush past, are the very moments that are paving the way for our future adult children. Will you pay attention to them today? Will you value them as gold and cherish them when you are weary and frustrated? You are doing a great job, do not grow weary in well doing!